


A Little Bit Longer

by blahthelarry



Series: We're Like Cocaine & Candy [2]
Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Addiction, Future Fic, Getting Back Together, Implied/Referenced Drug Addiction, M/M, Near Future, Past Character Death
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-06-17
Updated: 2017-06-17
Packaged: 2018-11-15 08:36:22
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,981
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11227293
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/blahthelarry/pseuds/blahthelarry
Summary: Louis could pretend it never happened. He could keep running like he always does and he'd do it for Harry.But "it" won't go away. It still lurks in the shadows and the corner of his mind. Every time he thinks he's finally escaped, it comes back.





	A Little Bit Longer

Louis turned over onto his side and sipped the rest of the cheap wine from his plastic sip-e-cup. The nozzle was so chewed up every time he put it to his lips it felt like he was being sliced. The sharp pieces weren’t as harsh as the voices from outside the door. He couldn’t decide if he wanted to continue pretending to not hear them or if he wanted to jump out of the window. Either way would probably get him into trouble, the first a lot less severe. How would it get him into trouble?

He smiled from behind the cup.

The dark figure in the corner came forward and flipped him off.

“They never shut up about you do they?”

The figure Louis was referring to was the one that had been born in the back of his mind months ago. It liked to take the form of the people he had done wrong and today it was Niall, looking young and very put together.

He was like a breath of fresh air compared to Louis' unshaven face and scraggly clothes. The holes in his jeans were beyond the size of one hand and was noticeable that it wasn't for fashion. He’d been stuck in this room for about an hour, browsing through his twitter feed while listening in to the conversation outside of the door. There wasn’t much going on on his profile, though he always got a lot of mentions. A few were speculating another breakup and a lot were just excited that the band was making another album. He never replied anymore and never posted except for the time Allen forced him to at least acknowledge that he was alive.

He sighed and frowned at his screen once more. Behind the device he could see Niall grinning at him.

“What is it now?” When it came to see him, it was always to demand something of him. Sometimes it was to annoy him or rub it in his face that he would never be as good as the other band members. It was fascinated with his insecurities and he had not found a way to make it stop bothering him.

But this time felt different compared to the others. He wasn’t sure if it was the atmosphere or the last few days that were messing with his head. There was something off about it now, though it didn’t seem to change its antics. He needed to stop talking about it as if it were an actual creature and not just a figment of his imagination. The hardest thing about that was truly believing that it couldn’t possibly be real. There were a lot of times that he thought it was the real person it was pretending to be, but he would soon realize that it wasn’t when some of the facts didn’t add up or when it slipped up and said something the real person wouldn’t say. Slowly it was disappearing, falling apart and only then would he be completely free of it.

It grinned so hard that its eyes became thin lines. “I’ve been so lonely now that Harry’s been speaking to you.”

Louis gave it a pointed look. “So? Allen probably put him up to do it.”

“Oh? Even after what happened at the party? It seemed like you guys made up.”

“It wasn’t quite like that,” he said, only paying half attention to what was on his phone’s screen.

What it was saying was actually true. At the party that Harry had held, he’d snooped through Harry’s things and when he was caught, Harry hadn’t done anything but shove him up against a wall and hug him. It was more than a surprise. Louis had thought that he was going to get the beating of his life and yet he didn’t do anything. He would have let Harry kill him. It was all kinds of fucked up.

Since that day two weeks ago, he hadn’t thought hard about it. He should have at least acknowledged that that night never should have happened even though they didn’t _do_ anything. It just felt like they had dipped their hands into a cookie jar without being caught. Those types of things always made their way back around, serving justice worse than karma.

It crawled towards him, taking its time to scoot as close as it could to his side. Its skin felt so real that it made a shiver run down his spine. That was one thing he could never get used to feeling when it was near. He couldn’t convince a part of his mind that this was all pretend, that this wasn’t entirely real. The touch of its skin and the after effects of its lingering fingers upon him were like soft memories painted onto him. He couldn’t push the comfort or the begging inside of him to keep it around, not even when it was tearing him apart.

He couldn’t help himself for wanting to be wanted.

The knock on the door startled him. He had just enough time to sit up before the door opened and Liam poked his head in.

“Hey, we’re heading out,” he said without meeting Louis’ eyes.

Louis saved him from embarrassing them both and stood up. It followed his move and wrapped its arm around his waist. Liam couldn’t see the look upon its face, glaring as hard as it could. Anger radiated off it like a geyser, singeing Louis’ shoulder and the back of his neck.

It had changed its form once again, a mirror reflection of Liam standing in the doorway. Lips touched Louis’ ear. “I wonder if he could look at you the same way if he knew what you’d the past year. I doubt he could stomach the filthy things you did just on the night Zayn—“

“Shut the fuck up!”

The words were out before he could take them back. His lips pressed tight into a thin line and he held his breath until stars glazed over his eyes. The beating of his heart threatened to break from the cradle of his ribs. And all while this happened, it laughed until it started to cry.

Liam backed away. His silence was more frightening than its mockery. “We’ll be outside.”

By “we” he meant he and Harry. The two of them had turned into best friends, tied at the hip since the night of the party. The only reason why Louis was here was because Allen wanted the band to bond like they had in the past. But Niall and Allen were stuck at the office, working on another single before they all sat down to write a full album. It was all ass backwards to work like this, but Allen thought it was best to do it this way, slowly integrating into the media before shocking the masses.

Liam disappeared down the hallway. It giggled behind its hand though it wasn’t like it was shy.

His face flushed after the fact and the breath he’d been holding rushed out once he thought it was safe to do so. The glare he sent its way did nothing but give it something else to laugh at.

“Oh, you should have seen your face! He really must think you’re crazy as shit.”

He didn’t stay to heard the rest of what it had to say. The lies that it spew didn’t mean anything.

As he left he heard it scream and throw something at the wall. The further he walked, the louder the screaming grew.

***

Harry drove them to the studio in his car and seemed happy unlike any other time. Perhaps he was happy to have Liam there to ease the tension and not because he had to drive his coworkers to work. If it had been Louis, he would have been a little pissed to have to waste his time on someone else.

But he was a shit person. What he thought didn’t matter.

He slid down in his seat, yanking at his seat belt. The material scratched at his throat, leaving behind red marks and a strong urge to dig his fingernails into his skin. They stopped at red light. Out of the corner of his eye, he could see a girl notice them in the car and tell her friend. They both stood in shock for a bit before they pulled out their phones to take picture but by that time they were gone. He didn’t turn around, only hoping that they didn’t try to follow them. They could catch a ride, but he doubted they were be able to keep up with them for too long.

“How’s Holly?” They turned a corner.

Liam chuckled while fiddling with the arm rest. “Just started school a few weeks ago. She’s got a mouth alright. Told the teacher to stick it where the sun doesn’t shine.” His laugh died off. “Oh, god. Maybe I’m not fit for parenting.”

Harry patted him on the shoulder. “Don’t think that. You’re a great parent. Holly’s only expressing herself in the wrong way. I’m sure you can figure it all out.”

It had to be the strangest thing Louis heard Harry say. He said it in a detached voice. Like he was not here but looming outside of the car looking in. Liam couldn’t have known the difference in the Harry sitting in the car and the one Louis truly knew.

To distance himself from the fakeness, he turned to the window and blocked out the rest of the conversation. Harry could try and place himself at the center of attention, but Louis was never going to take the bait. He didn’t entirely regret that night. It had opened wounds and revealed some truth behind the lies. His eyes drifted close and the lull of the car pushed him deeper into his mind. That night, he saw a glimpse of the man he’d fallen in love with.

He had hope to see him again.

***

Allen handed out packets outlining the schedule and the plan for promoting the singles and album. Louis noticed the way he thrust the packet into his own hand and delicately handed the others their own. He scowled at the man’s back and stuck his tongue out when he made sure no one was watching.

“We have one month until the next single will be released. Of course, you’ll figure who will sing each part and make any corrections two weeks before the due date listed,” Allen said. He walked to the front of the meeting room. “Further down you’ll see scheduled dates for when we’d like things to be completed.”

Louis laid his head down on the table and used the packet as added cushion. It didn’t do much but leave a staple imprint on his forehead.

He was about to drift to sleep when he felt a hand press against the lower of his pack. His breath hitched as the hand began to knead in small circular motions.

The whisper in his ear reminded him of better days. “You feelin’ sick?”

The touch transported him back years to a time when he didn’t have to hide behind a facade. He could talk the way he wanted and didn’t have to second guess his every move. Harry didn’t worry about the way he touched him and he didn’t have to hold some girl’s hand. Those were the days before they had to stop being themselves. They were living then; they were dead now.

He shook off Harry’s touch. “I’m good.”

He wasn’t good. He was anything but.

One look at Harry’s face would have made him change his mind. It would have broken him to pieces and he would have gone with him if he wanted. But this wasn’t just about Louis. This was about Harry too.

It had always been about Harry.


End file.
